please do tell us about your barush/balthamos feelings, just let it all out
There are some themes, some subjects, too large for adult fiction; they can only be dealt with adequately in a children’s book.
Asriel: I ask for one kid and you bring me my daughter?!?!?!?
Lyra: I came out to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now
please do tell us about your barush/balthamos feelings, just let it all out
(why would you even ask that anon, do you WANT me to pour sadness and feels all over you)
The following will contain spoilers for The Subtle Knife and The Amber Spyglass in the His Dark Materials trilogy
… *SLAMS DOWN GIGANTIC BOOK AND OPENS ON PAGE ONE TO TALK ABOUT MY BARUCH/BALTHAMOS FEELS*
SO LET’S START WITH THE FACT THAT THESE TWO ARE SO INCREDIBLY IN LOVE THAT YOU CAN’T BELIEVE IT AND IT’S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING EVER (and also completely normal and open to see for a twelve year old boy and that’s important from a story perspective.)
JUST LOOK AT BALTHAMOS GETTING ALL PUPPY EXCITED WHEN BARUCH COMES BACK AND THEN WILL SEES THEM BEING SO OBVIOUSLY IN LOVE AND HE’S FINE WITH THAT
“And barely ten minutes later the soft sound of wingbeats came to their ears, and Balthamos stood up eagerly. The next moment, the two angels were embracing, and Will, gazing into the flames, saw their mutual affection. More than affection: they loved each other with a passion.”
Let’s then look at them a bit more individually.
“Balthamos was slender; his narrow wings were folded elegantly behind his shoulders, and his face bore an expression that mingled haughty disdain with a tender, ardent sympathy, as if he would love all things if only his nature could let him forget their defects. But he saw no defects in Baruch, that was clear. Baruch seemed younger, as Balthamos had said he was, and was more powerfully built, his wings snow-white and massive. He had a simpler nature; he looked up to Balthamos as to the fount of all knowledge and joy.”
SO ON ONE HAND WE HAVE BARUCH WHO LOOKS UP TO BALTHAMOS AND THINKS HE’S THE MOST WONDERFUL THING. STOP BEING SO IN LOVE STUPID ANGELS YOU’RE MAKING ME UPSET.
AND THEN ON THE OTHER HAND WE HAVE BALTHAMOS WHO SEEMS FLAWS IN EVERYTHING, ESPECIALLY THE HUMAN WORLD, EXCEPT FOR BARUCH. BARUCH IS PERFECT TO HIM. AND THIS IS IMPORTANT BECAUSE BARUCH USED TO BE HUMAN.
Baruch used to be human, and Balthamos fell in love with him already then. It is implied that Baruch was driven away by his brother due to his homosexuality. He then died and Balthamos made him an angel. Let me say that again: AN ANGEL WHO WAS SERVING THE AUTHORITY RAISED A MAN TO BECOME AN ANGEL EVEN THOUGH SAID MAN HAD BEEN DRIVEN AWAY BY HIS BROTHER,WHO THEN BECAME AN ANGEL AS WELL, THE VOICE OF GOD, BECAUSE HE FELL IN LOVE WITH HIM AND COULD FIND NO FLAWS IN HIM.
And that was THOUSANDS OF YEARS AGO. THEY’VE HAD THAT LOVE FOR FOUR THOUSAND YEARS. IT IS IMPLIED THAT THIS WAS THE REASON THEY GOT THROWN OUT OF “HEAVEN”, EXCEPT FOR THE WHOLE JOINING THE REBELLION THINGY.
They are also in contact with each other, even when they’re apart.
“Which world is this?” Will said.
“The girl’s own world. This is where they came through. Baruch has gone ahead to follow them.”
“How do you know? Do you read his mind?”
“Of course I read his mind. Wherever he goes, my heart goes with him; we feel as one, though we are two.”
WHO EVEN SAYS THAT.
also THIS IS WHERE THE SADNESS STARTS SO BE PREPARED FOR THAT.
So yeah they’re there to lead Will along because his mission is to help Lord Asriel, etc etc. And Baruch needs to fly to Lord Asriel and bring him the information him and Balthamos found. Except ON HIS WAY THERE BARUCH GETS FATALY WOUNDED AND WHEN HE ARRIVES TO LORD ASRIEL HE IS DYING. AND HE CAN BARELY KEEP HIS THOUGHTS OR SPEECH STRAIGHT. HE MANAGES TO GIVE THE INFORMATION, BECAUSE BARUCH IS THE MOST STUBBORN AND BRAVE CREATURE THERE EVER WAS, BUT HE KEEPS TALKING ABOUT OTHER THIGNS, AND HE’S BASICALLY CRYING AND SAYS SOMETHING ALONG THE LINES OF “the only regrets I have is that I’ll never see my beloved Balthamos again” AND THEN HE DIES AND HIS LAST WORD IS BALTHAMOS AND I AM SAD.
BUT IT GETS WORSE. Because what makes it even more sad, is Balthamos reaction to it. Remember how they could read each other’s mind and stuff? Yeah. Prepare for one of the saddest paragraphs ever written in fiction.
"But Balthamos couldn’t tell; he only knew that half his heart had been extinguished. He couldn’t keep still: he flew up again, scouring the sky as if to seek out Baruch in this cloud or that, calling, crying, calling; and then he’d be overcome with guilt, and fly down to urge Will to hide and keep quiet, and promise to watch over him tirelessly; and then the pressure of his grief would crush him to the ground, and he’d remember every instance of kindness and courage that Baruch had ever shown, and there were thousands, and he’d forgotten none of them; and he’d cry that a nature so gracious could ever be snuffed out, and he’d soar into the skies again, casting about in every direction, reckless and wild and stricken, cursing the air, the clouds, the stars."
THIS is the angel who made his lover an angel because he couldn’t bear to lose him and let him go to the land of the dead. And now he’s gone. And he wasn’t there.
Because the thing is, Balthamos is FAR from perfect. He is whiny, he is too proud, he’s a coward, which shows several times. He’s downright unlikable at times. But Baruch loved him all the same. And Baruch was brave and outspoken and everything Balthamos wasn’t. And he thinks that he can never live up to that. Especially since he just keeps on being a coward and thinks that he’s let Baruch down. BALTHAMOS IS A MUCH OLDER ANGEL THAN BARUCH, HE WAS AN ANGEL FROM THE START, AND YET HE IS THE ONE WHO IS AFRAID OF LETTING HIM DOWN.
But in the end, after running away and letting people down, he does get the chance to prove himself. Balthamos is not strong, he is weak, he can get hurt really easily. But he kills a man, and without knowing it truly, he saves the world. The universe, ALL universes. All because he killed a man who was going to shoot a woman who was going to talk to a young girl about marzipan. He kills this man, and gets injured himself, he is already dying, but he fights this man with his last breaths and in the end all he can think about is Baruch and how he can finally be at peace and that he hopes Baruch is pleased with him.
And angels are made out of dust, and dust are particles, and I can just imagine, how every particle of Baruch and every particle of Balthamos will be floating through the universes in search for each other until they are reunited once more. At least that’s what I like to believe.
And it makes me cry. Their story. They are side characters in a book which has so much in it, and yet they leave an impact. Both on the story and on the reader. And the fact that their love isn’t seen as anything weird by one of the main character of the book - it is seen as one of the most natural things in the world - really matters. It is not shoved in your face (which this book CAN do with certain things at times), it is just there, and it is beautiful and heartbreaking. They MEAN something. And they are not perfect, neither of them, but they see perfection in each other, with all their flaws included. Their love for each other is amazing. And it will continue to be one of the saddest and yet most beautiful things I’ve ever read for a very very long time.
things we could have had if the Golden Compass movie had been successful
- little toy alethiometers that you could turn the hands of
- will parry
- stuffed animal PANs
- will fucking parry
- mary malone
- the mulefa
- will pARRY
- a beatiful love arch with no fucking triangles just mutual trust and caring bc literally went through hell together
- WILL FUCKING PARRY